Till Bits
The only thing uglier than last night's shitkicking by the LA Kings (they of the ONE playoff series win since Kerry Fraser giftwrapped their ticket to the Finals in '93) was having to read the reaction. With blood in the air, it seems like everybody had to weigh in with their doom scenario. Do you remember that US candidates' debate a few years back, when they asked everyone to name their hero? Everyone took turns intoning "Jesus Christ" in a way that was supposed to let us know that unlike the other seven guys, they were REALLY down with the JC. Change the question to "How fucked are the Leafs?" and the answers to variations on "thousands of years from now, children will study this 07-08 season and cry uncomprehending, bloody tears" and you have what was served up this morning. Here it is, in bits:
Not to be outdone by today's Shoaltsclusive (which, upon examination, appears to be nothing more substantial than "Fergie's getting canned eventually probably, and most of the board own BlackBerrys!" Damn you Shoalts!) the Star's website stuck Cox's blog entry as the lead item on their website... good to know we can get insight like the latest awkward swing in DC Talk's longstanding handbags-at-twenty-paces feud with Darcy "he only scores at the tail end of blowouts" to the widest possible audience... for a guy who hates fighting, Damien sure seemed to enjoy Darcy getting pummeled by Jarko Ruuttu, didn't he?.... Simmons countered by running a hectoring interview with a guy at Teacher's who he says has the power but actually doesn't... didn't stop Steve from trying to make the guy look bad. For a guy who seems to have every third column (Eg: today's column) ghostwritten by Peddie, Steve doesn't know much about how the board works... that's why they call him the Champ.... Howard Berger, while dead-on about how grim the Leafs efforts have gotten (somewhere between the middle third of Trainspotting and last half of Apocalypse Now on my scale), inexplicably thinks that firing JFJ and Maurice is only a "quick fix" that won't have lasting effects. Wrong. If there is to be a rebuild, it has to start now, and you hire someone competent to start the process that Brylcreem can't and won't. Otherwise, every day is wasted... Berger suggests waiving Raycroft, which is a quick fix that only takes us further away from the goal of this season: Stamkos in '08! GET WITH THE PROGRAM BERGER!...
And finally, 680 ran somebody over to the McDonald's on Steeles and asked Gord Stellick about his take on this mess. He chortled at the blatant optimism of Leafs fans. I think that's what he said- there's usually a lot of static on those drive thru mikes. Anyways, we all needed a bit of a reality check from the clear-eyed realist who traded Russ Courtnall for JOHN &%*$*#&@&@*@ KORDIC, didn't we? He might have a point, though. After years of cheering for a team run by the Stellicks and Brylcreems of the world, the fact that Leafs fans are getting up in the morning and not leaping in front of trains is an act of heroic optimism in itself...actually I heard Raycroft jumped in front of a bus last nite. You know the rest....
Not to be outdone by today's Shoaltsclusive (which, upon examination, appears to be nothing more substantial than "Fergie's getting canned eventually probably, and most of the board own BlackBerrys!" Damn you Shoalts!) the Star's website stuck Cox's blog entry as the lead item on their website... good to know we can get insight like the latest awkward swing in DC Talk's longstanding handbags-at-twenty-paces feud with Darcy "he only scores at the tail end of blowouts" to the widest possible audience... for a guy who hates fighting, Damien sure seemed to enjoy Darcy getting pummeled by Jarko Ruuttu, didn't he?.... Simmons countered by running a hectoring interview with a guy at Teacher's who he says has the power but actually doesn't... didn't stop Steve from trying to make the guy look bad. For a guy who seems to have every third column (Eg: today's column) ghostwritten by Peddie, Steve doesn't know much about how the board works... that's why they call him the Champ.... Howard Berger, while dead-on about how grim the Leafs efforts have gotten (somewhere between the middle third of Trainspotting and last half of Apocalypse Now on my scale), inexplicably thinks that firing JFJ and Maurice is only a "quick fix" that won't have lasting effects. Wrong. If there is to be a rebuild, it has to start now, and you hire someone competent to start the process that Brylcreem can't and won't. Otherwise, every day is wasted... Berger suggests waiving Raycroft, which is a quick fix that only takes us further away from the goal of this season: Stamkos in '08! GET WITH THE PROGRAM BERGER!...
And finally, 680 ran somebody over to the McDonald's on Steeles and asked Gord Stellick about his take on this mess. He chortled at the blatant optimism of Leafs fans. I think that's what he said- there's usually a lot of static on those drive thru mikes. Anyways, we all needed a bit of a reality check from the clear-eyed realist who traded Russ Courtnall for JOHN &%*$*#&@&@*@ KORDIC, didn't we? He might have a point, though. After years of cheering for a team run by the Stellicks and Brylcreems of the world, the fact that Leafs fans are getting up in the morning and not leaping in front of trains is an act of heroic optimism in itself...actually I heard Raycroft jumped in front of a bus last nite. You know the rest....
It should be noted that Duhatschek's column on the Globe site tackled all these issues with perspective, analysis, and intelligence. Nice one, ED.
Cone...flogging...dog...bullpen...
Solid post, Godd. One of your very best.
Damn you, Shoalts, indeed. I haven't had my hopes raised and lowered in such rapid succession since Iowa and New Hampshire, 2008.