Never Send A Roy To Do A Man's Job
Bob Elliott turns back the clock to analyze Roy Halladay's latest victory:
The 1985 Halladay would have run upstairs, jumped into his Superman PJs and not even come down from his room to watch his favourite double bill of The A-Team and Mama's Family.
The 1979 Halladay would have rolled about on the mound in a miasma of his own feces, bawling uncomprehendingly while grateful Oriole batters circled the bases. Later, a seagull would land on the rosin bag and ravage his tender skin mercilessly, while John Gibbons called the bullpen to get Jason Frasor up.
Whew! The Jays really dodged a bullet there, huh?
This one would have gotten away on the old Roy Halladay.
The 1999 Halladay would have been bouncing pitches to the backstop
after Melvin Mora reached in the first inning when plate ump Bill
Miller ruled he'd been hit by a pitch. Halladay argued that the
Baltimore Orioles batter had swung.
Now, the run-of-the-mill media criticism blog would carp that comparing Halladay of today to the man of a decade ago, 110 wins and a Cy Young later, is lame and tired. "Hasn't the statue of limitations run out on immature Halladay comparisons?" it would bleat. Here at Cox Bloc, we don't believe it went far enough. Bob should have had the intellectual commitment to pursue that lede to its logical conclusion:
The 1992 Halladay would have stormed off the mound, gotten into his buddy JD's rusty Taurus, and driven around slamming Maximum Ice and cranking Alice in Chains.The 1985 Halladay would have run upstairs, jumped into his Superman PJs and not even come down from his room to watch his favourite double bill of The A-Team and Mama's Family.
The 1979 Halladay would have rolled about on the mound in a miasma of his own feces, bawling uncomprehendingly while grateful Oriole batters circled the bases. Later, a seagull would land on the rosin bag and ravage his tender skin mercilessly, while John Gibbons called the bullpen to get Jason Frasor up.
Whew! The Jays really dodged a bullet there, huh?
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